Hi guys!
Just a small foot note before I start the rant discussion: I know that in the previous episode (link), I said that I was going to talk about grades the next episode, but a couple days later I ended up writing a super awesome episode which both of my parents approved of, so that's what I'm posting today.
Whooooooo's ready? I AM.
What do you want to be when you grow up?
The first time I wrote a Dear Adults letter...episode...thingie (uh...?), it was with the intention of destroying the phrase, ‘these are the best years of your life, so enjoy ‘em’. Shudder. As most of you know, I utterly ripped it to shreds, pointing out how incredibly insulting it was, no matter the interpretation. It was pretty popular, probably because I went to town on it and was aggressive, sarcastic, but also somewhat fair on the topic.
Today, I’m going to attempt (attempt!) to do the exact same thing, but with a new phrase. You guessed it: what do you want to be when you grow up?
This phrase always confuses me, and has since I was a little kid. If you can imagine little five year old Noelle, all blonde hair and goofiness, drawing away. I’ve asked around, and can I dispel a myth on the side - artists are not made through practice alone. Yes, practice will dramatically benefit you, as well as getting good teachers who encourage you, friends who can critique you, proper ‘artist quality’ supplies, and exploring new styles. But I was born an artist, with actual talent. I don’t know if that’s a bad thing or a good thing, and honestly, it’s just a thing. BUT BACK ON TOPIC.
The first time I wrote a Dear Adults letter...episode...thingie (uh...?), it was with the intention of destroying the phrase, ‘these are the best years of your life, so enjoy ‘em’. Shudder. As most of you know, I utterly ripped it to shreds, pointing out how incredibly insulting it was, no matter the interpretation. It was pretty popular, probably because I went to town on it and was aggressive, sarcastic, but also somewhat fair on the topic.
Today, I’m going to attempt (attempt!) to do the exact same thing, but with a new phrase. You guessed it: what do you want to be when you grow up?
This phrase always confuses me, and has since I was a little kid. If you can imagine little five year old Noelle, all blonde hair and goofiness, drawing away. I’ve asked around, and can I dispel a myth on the side - artists are not made through practice alone. Yes, practice will dramatically benefit you, as well as getting good teachers who encourage you, friends who can critique you, proper ‘artist quality’ supplies, and exploring new styles. But I was born an artist, with actual talent. I don’t know if that’s a bad thing or a good thing, and honestly, it’s just a thing. BUT BACK ON TOPIC.
When I was a little kid, I distinctly remember relatives and friends of relatives asking me, “What do you want to me when you grow up?”
Scenario #1:
Them: What do you want to be when you grow up?
Me: An arc-ee-olly-gist. (or whatever the heck I wanted to be at the time. There was a time when I thought ‘frog breeder’ was a thing. I was horrified to discover it isn’t)
Them: But you’re such a great drawer*! You should be an artist! You’d be great at it!
Scenario #2:
Them: What do you want to be when you grow up?
Me: I dunno
Them: How about a scientist? Or a mathematician?**
Me: Can I be a singer?
Them: uh
Me: An artist?
Them: Sure sweetie
And then they’d kinda brush me off, like, ‘who cares, it’s just a little girl’. They have a point, I was five, and my concept of the future only went as far as my age - in minutes. Whatever the future was, it only existed for five minutes, and beyond that was an empty abyss that didn’t matter at all.
*Side note: Drawer is not a real word. It took me years to figure this out, because adults kept using around me
**Double side note: what exactly do mathematicians do, anyway? Cuz I didn’t have a CLUE as a child and I still don’t
What interests me is: if you’re not going to be happy with what I say, then why bother asking? Don’t even try to argue, ‘It’s just asking a kid a question, no big deal’ because I have been asked this all my life, even to this day! And what’s really interesting, and partially insulting, is that while the two scenarios haven’t changed, people’s reactions have. It seems the older I get, the more people expect me to abandon my dreams and give up life as a hopeless cubicle slave.
I mean this totally literally, of course.
Here, I’ll prove it:
Scenario #1:
Them: What do you want to be when you grow up?
Me: A author
Them: But you’re such a great drawer [still not a word]! You should be an artist! You’d be great at it!
Me: I know, but writing is my real passion, and I’d like to be an author.
Them: What kind of author?
Me: Fiction, probably young adult/fantasy. I like to work with a bunch of different subje-
Them: You know there’s already a bunch of great young adult authors, right? [No, really, people flat out said that to me. Way to be encouraging to the next generation]
Scenario #2:
Them: What do you want to be when you grow up?
Me: I’m not sure, exactly [I’ve refined a bit since my five year old years]
Them: Well, you’re in high school. Gotta chose that degree sooner or later, or else you’ll end up in your parent’s basement haha.
Me: Well I really enjoy art, writing, and music.
Them: So you really want to be in your parents basement.
Me: No, I think that anybody can make money doing something they love and-
Them: Entitled generation! Selfie generation! Spewing stuff about politics!
Me: *backs away slowly*
Okay, maybe it doesn’t go exactly like that, but I’d still appreciate it if my dreams were taken seriously. ANYWAY. Back to the main point: why exactly do adults ask, ‘what do you want to be when you grow up?’
When you’re a kid, the most you’ll be exposed to is the basic, heroic jobs, like police man, firefighter, astronaut - the kind of people that appear on TV, encouraging children across good ol’ America to eat healthy, stay and school, and don’t do drugs. When you’re a teenager, you’re expected to start getting your pathetic life together and to chase a passion that will land you a job with lots of money, ambition, respect, and room to eventually rise to the top - jobs like lawyers, doctors, scientists, etc. Stray outside the lines of normal answers, and you’ll be perceived as strange and, God forbid, thinking for yourself.
Because that’s what it boils down to: the phrase, ‘what do you want to be when you grow up,’ isn’t about what you actually want to be. When I was a kid, I wanted to be an archeologist, and that got shoved aside as kid weirdness - which it was, because I decided to chase my real passion. As a teenager, I’m not expected to follow those passions - I’m expected to be looking for a high paying, socially-acceptable job, and nothing else. Oh, and as a girl, I’m supposed to be looking for the perfect husband (angels sing in the distance) and want to have eight children in the future.
Okay, well here’s the truth (are you braced for it? You certain? Hold onto your hat, hang onto your baloney sandwich)
I want to be an young adult author.
I want to live in a tiny house, which I am already roughly designing.
I want to have a bunch of pets, like a cat and two sugar gliders, to keep me company while I write.
I don’t want children.
I don’t want to work in a cubicle like what seems to be 87% of society does.
I want to do what I love, and if I make money from it, then that’s all the better.
And here’s the best part: I’m already chasing my dream. Forget ‘when you grow up’, because that’s the most insulting, rude, ill-mannered, uncivil part of this question. It implies that, as a teenager, I can’t do anything more than dream of the future, get good grades in school, and hope that a college will allow me to give them thousands of dollars for an education and a piece of paper that makes me a socially-acceptable adult. It implies that I am not chasing my dreams. It implies that I have to be over 21 to have a job, be a member of society, and to have a voice.
It implies that my voice doesn’t matter.
I know that’s not what you mean, adults, I really do. But here’s some news: I already am working towards that future of a tiny house. I’m already making my mark as an author, blogger, and artist, and I don’t mean to be a braggart, but I think I’m doing pretty good for a teenager! So I ask you: what do you want to be when you grow up?
I like to finish off these Dear Adults post with a diagnosis, and the last few diagnoses have all been the same: staaaaph. HOWEVER. That’s not what’s happening today. Today, the diagnosis is: trade the phrase for, or ‘what are your hobbies?’ It’s better-mannered, is more respectful of what they enjoy doing, and ultimately has the same basic meaning.
Adults: Yeah, just, trade out the questions. No big deal.
Teenagers: CHASE THOSE DREAMS, YO!!! Also, next time you have to go to a social gathering where you’ll eventually be asked this question, here’s the ideal way to deal with it - smile, nod the entire time, and when the question finally drops, just say with your most dazzling smile, “A grave digger.”
(bonus points if you get a picture of their reaction)
Bye!
P.S.
I know not every adult asks this, and I know that you don’t mean it like this. Chill your beans.
Double P.S.
Comment below with what phrase or aspect of teenager-hood I should talk about in the next episode!
Scenario #1:
Them: What do you want to be when you grow up?
Me: An arc-ee-olly-gist. (or whatever the heck I wanted to be at the time. There was a time when I thought ‘frog breeder’ was a thing. I was horrified to discover it isn’t)
Them: But you’re such a great drawer*! You should be an artist! You’d be great at it!
Scenario #2:
Them: What do you want to be when you grow up?
Me: I dunno
Them: How about a scientist? Or a mathematician?**
Me: Can I be a singer?
Them: uh
Me: An artist?
Them: Sure sweetie
And then they’d kinda brush me off, like, ‘who cares, it’s just a little girl’. They have a point, I was five, and my concept of the future only went as far as my age - in minutes. Whatever the future was, it only existed for five minutes, and beyond that was an empty abyss that didn’t matter at all.
*Side note: Drawer is not a real word. It took me years to figure this out, because adults kept using around me
**Double side note: what exactly do mathematicians do, anyway? Cuz I didn’t have a CLUE as a child and I still don’t
What interests me is: if you’re not going to be happy with what I say, then why bother asking? Don’t even try to argue, ‘It’s just asking a kid a question, no big deal’ because I have been asked this all my life, even to this day! And what’s really interesting, and partially insulting, is that while the two scenarios haven’t changed, people’s reactions have. It seems the older I get, the more people expect me to abandon my dreams and give up life as a hopeless cubicle slave.
I mean this totally literally, of course.
Here, I’ll prove it:
Scenario #1:
Them: What do you want to be when you grow up?
Me: A author
Them: But you’re such a great drawer [still not a word]! You should be an artist! You’d be great at it!
Me: I know, but writing is my real passion, and I’d like to be an author.
Them: What kind of author?
Me: Fiction, probably young adult/fantasy. I like to work with a bunch of different subje-
Them: You know there’s already a bunch of great young adult authors, right? [No, really, people flat out said that to me. Way to be encouraging to the next generation]
Scenario #2:
Them: What do you want to be when you grow up?
Me: I’m not sure, exactly [I’ve refined a bit since my five year old years]
Them: Well, you’re in high school. Gotta chose that degree sooner or later, or else you’ll end up in your parent’s basement haha.
Me: Well I really enjoy art, writing, and music.
Them: So you really want to be in your parents basement.
Me: No, I think that anybody can make money doing something they love and-
Them: Entitled generation! Selfie generation! Spewing stuff about politics!
Me: *backs away slowly*
Okay, maybe it doesn’t go exactly like that, but I’d still appreciate it if my dreams were taken seriously. ANYWAY. Back to the main point: why exactly do adults ask, ‘what do you want to be when you grow up?’
When you’re a kid, the most you’ll be exposed to is the basic, heroic jobs, like police man, firefighter, astronaut - the kind of people that appear on TV, encouraging children across good ol’ America to eat healthy, stay and school, and don’t do drugs. When you’re a teenager, you’re expected to start getting your pathetic life together and to chase a passion that will land you a job with lots of money, ambition, respect, and room to eventually rise to the top - jobs like lawyers, doctors, scientists, etc. Stray outside the lines of normal answers, and you’ll be perceived as strange and, God forbid, thinking for yourself.
Because that’s what it boils down to: the phrase, ‘what do you want to be when you grow up,’ isn’t about what you actually want to be. When I was a kid, I wanted to be an archeologist, and that got shoved aside as kid weirdness - which it was, because I decided to chase my real passion. As a teenager, I’m not expected to follow those passions - I’m expected to be looking for a high paying, socially-acceptable job, and nothing else. Oh, and as a girl, I’m supposed to be looking for the perfect husband (angels sing in the distance) and want to have eight children in the future.
Okay, well here’s the truth (are you braced for it? You certain? Hold onto your hat, hang onto your baloney sandwich)
I want to be an young adult author.
I want to live in a tiny house, which I am already roughly designing.
I want to have a bunch of pets, like a cat and two sugar gliders, to keep me company while I write.
I don’t want children.
I don’t want to work in a cubicle like what seems to be 87% of society does.
I want to do what I love, and if I make money from it, then that’s all the better.
And here’s the best part: I’m already chasing my dream. Forget ‘when you grow up’, because that’s the most insulting, rude, ill-mannered, uncivil part of this question. It implies that, as a teenager, I can’t do anything more than dream of the future, get good grades in school, and hope that a college will allow me to give them thousands of dollars for an education and a piece of paper that makes me a socially-acceptable adult. It implies that I am not chasing my dreams. It implies that I have to be over 21 to have a job, be a member of society, and to have a voice.
It implies that my voice doesn’t matter.
I know that’s not what you mean, adults, I really do. But here’s some news: I already am working towards that future of a tiny house. I’m already making my mark as an author, blogger, and artist, and I don’t mean to be a braggart, but I think I’m doing pretty good for a teenager! So I ask you: what do you want to be when you grow up?
I like to finish off these Dear Adults post with a diagnosis, and the last few diagnoses have all been the same: staaaaph. HOWEVER. That’s not what’s happening today. Today, the diagnosis is: trade the phrase for, or ‘what are your hobbies?’ It’s better-mannered, is more respectful of what they enjoy doing, and ultimately has the same basic meaning.
Adults: Yeah, just, trade out the questions. No big deal.
Teenagers: CHASE THOSE DREAMS, YO!!! Also, next time you have to go to a social gathering where you’ll eventually be asked this question, here’s the ideal way to deal with it - smile, nod the entire time, and when the question finally drops, just say with your most dazzling smile, “A grave digger.”
(bonus points if you get a picture of their reaction)
Bye!
P.S.
I know not every adult asks this, and I know that you don’t mean it like this. Chill your beans.
Double P.S.
Comment below with what phrase or aspect of teenager-hood I should talk about in the next episode!
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