From the Archives: What To Do When an Essay Says 'Screw You'

Hi guys!
As many of you know, I've recently switched blogs.  There are a couple posts I actually really like, and I've decided to repost them on here.  Don't worry, I won't be spamming, it'll be posted over time, bit by bit.  This is the first part of it!  I hope you like it.  Today I Met presents:  What To Do When an Essay Says 'Screw You!'


***


Somewhere,
In a distant land, probably the living room, my mother is being scandalized by my language in this blog post title (sorry mom)  Anyway, today we are going to talk about that essay.  Yes, that one.  The one where you read the prompt and just want to repeatedly slam your head against the desk because you already know that this essay is going to be the dullest one in the history ever.

:(

No, today is not a complaining post (although my brain and wacked up emotions want it to be).  Today, we're going to go through the steps to...well, maybe not ROCK this essay, but at least survive it.

Alllllrighty.

Step 1:  Write an outline
Yes, I know, outlines suck. But this will make fleshing out your essay much easier.  Find out your essay's word limits and assign each paragraph a number of words.  This will help, trust me.

Step 2:  Flesh it out
Believe it or not, this is the easiest bit.  Write those paragraphs (and you don't have to be A-B-C but in the order you want/feel like writing.  This is called dessert writing, and many authors prefer this method!)  Try to stick with the word limit, but it's okay to go over a couple (hundred).  And remember, this is the time to give this essay personality.  Make it  yours and don't worry too much about it.

Step 3:  Editing Part 1
If you have time immediately after writing, then go back.  Fix grammar and spelling mistakes.  Cut extraneous material, but leave that creativity in!  And keep  ignoring that word count.

Step 4:  Your soul dies Editing Part 2
Step away.  Do something else.  If you can, wait till the next day.  NOW:

This is the hard part, when you have to look at your essay as a teacher and answer the questions they're going to ask themselves when they're grading this.

Does this essay cover the material?  Make sure in your rambles, you haven't gone off topic.  Read the prompt again.  Read your essay.  Be honest when yourself as you figure out what doesn't belong.

Is this essay fundamentally correct?  No, I'm not talking about your opinions.  I mean, formatting, grammar, and spelling.  Most high school teachers call for MLA formatting.  It sucks and looks stupid, but teachers love that format.

Ahem.

Also, listen up buttercup:

"Comma inside the quote," she said.  "And Around Short Story Titles.  Unless It's a Longer Book Title."

You claim you're not good with grammar?  You need to improve your skills.

That's their toy.

Give it to them, over there.

They're going to beat you over the head if you don't.

Its tail.  (possessive.  The tail that belongs to it)

It's a tail (it is a tail)

There, now none of your stupid excuses!  You've got nothing to hide behind.

Back on subject.

Is this essay formal?  It maybe dry, but you have to be formal in an essay UNLESS specifically instructed not to.  This means:

• Cutting words like 'kids'.  Use 'children' instead.
• Not using 1st Or 2nd person.  Instead one should use the term one when asserting one's opinion.  (I know, it doesn't make sense to me either.)

Alright!  You may feel yourself dying inside, but your essay is complete!  Now, do not stress about it!  You've finished it up as best you can.  Stress is bad for you.  Drink tea instead.

You deserved it ;)

(see you next week)

Poems (continued)

More poetry for you lovely folks!  I hope you like these lol.  I will be posting some more substantial content later (lots of movie reviews and people descriptions) but for now, it's just little snippit poems for you :)

Rage

I wrote about my rage
I wrote it real polite
With fancy words
And a smile on my lips
But a bow on a box
Doesn't make it any less of a coffin

***

Bubble

If you lived in a bubble
Far outside of time
Would you spend your days enjoying your world
Or trying to get back to mine?

***

Don't

Don't ask questions
Don't disrespect your elders
Don't question authority
Are all rules
That I cannot seem to follow
Guess I'm not a good student

***

Respect Your Elders

Oh dear
Golly gee
How old do I have to be
Before I'm not 'acting inappropriately'
And I can remind kids
That they should respect me?

Poems

I've been trying to get my thoughts together as of late and I found out that short poems are often a good way to so!  Forgive my horrible rhymning skills, but I thought that some of these were cute and wanted to share them:

Too Busy Dreaming

Tick Tock

Time slips away

I reach for the future

Straining

But here I must stay

My feet on the ground

My head in the clouds

With people throwing darts saying,

"Hey!  Come back down!"

***

Demon Girl

I am a demon girl

With slitted eyes and fangs for teeth

I am a demon girl

Who chases after what she cannot reach

I am a demon girl

I ask questions and I wear skirts

Both are bad, trust in God

Go home, you're drunk, little demon girl

***

Help!  Human!

Help!

My writer doesn't like me!

She's getting the eraser

Quick, read me, then she can't-

Ohhhhh no, here it comes

Listen, this is important

The treasure is in the-

Barnes 'n' Noble People: Pt 4

Intro
Pt 2
Pt 3

• A Morgan Freeman doppelganger with a heavily patterned blue shirt and a African style hat who didn’t seem able to stop smiling (he also appeared to be a teacher, as he was red-penning a bunch of students  RIP a lot of kids)
• A rather Aunt style kind of lady with intense eyes hidden behind square framed glasses, greying blonde hair and a sweater with swirling patterns knitted in chatting with the Morgan Freeman guy about retirement and grandkids and the meaning life
• A guy with a baseball jersey-style jacket, a nearly identical t-shirt under that, a leather baseball cap with some kind of logo on it along with several baseball pins, giant black headphones, and a fat gold ring with what looks like a family crest on it.  He was very intently reading something in a binder, though it all looked very boring
• A worker who looks like a modern AU Daenerys from GoT
• Some lady who was honestly way too pretty and perfect to be wandering around in the real world, much less something as normal and boring as Barnes ‘n’ Noble
• A barista who looked like a T’Challa (Black Panther) from a coffee shop AU
• The cutest little girl in a stroller, smiling and babbling about something to her mom, wrapped up in a blanket with a pom pom hat over her puffy hair.  I almost died of cute when her mom called her ‘my ladybug’

Updates

Hey guys, sorry I haven't been all that active recently, I've been dealing with some stuff on my other blog, International Bffs.  Fortunately though, I'll be able to put some more effort into this blog now, because I've stepped away from International Bffs permanantly.  I'd still suggest reading it and supporting the new management, but yours truly won't be making any appearances.

Because of this change, I'll be making this blog my main blog for all my ramblings and reviews and theories.  Yup, that means change (*screaming in the distance*)  Here are some of the updates to look out for in the future!

• NOT:  an end to my people series, especially not the Barnes 'n' Noble people
• NOT:  a big deviation from what I meant this blog to be about in the first place
• Reposted stuff from my old blog
• Dear Adults!  Y'all are going to love this series
• Probably more reviews and theories, specifically about Marvel

Like I said, not too many changes!  Hopefully you like the updates and new stuff, and have a great day!

The Art of a 15 Minute Walk

1.  Silence your phone, but do bring it with you
2. If there's things weighing on your mind, write them down and then forget about them.  A walk doesn't do you any good if you can't focus on it
3. Dress appropriately - if it's cold, wear a coat.  If you're freezing, that's all you'll be able to focus on
4. Walk with a dog.  You can take a friend if you want, but then you'll want to talk.  A dog will force you to stop every so often so they can sniff and you can look around, enjoying this wonderful world
5. Look for something new everyday - a pretty fall leaf, a lady bug, the PTA moms doing their lunges down the sidewalk.  It doesn't have to be out of place or unusual to catch your eye
6. Don't let it go over, especially if you've got things to get done, but try to walk the full fifteen minutes every time
7. Soak in the sun light, if you can
8. Walking the same route everyday can allow you to see new little changes (this is especially good during the fall and spring)  Alternatively, walking a different route allows you to discover new things every time
9. Walk everyday
10. And finally, don't take a blog's word for it:  go out and see your corner of the world

Barnes 'n' Noble People: Pt. 3

Horray for Friday nights


Intro

Part 2

• The elderly couple carrying off loads of reduced price, cold brew coffee makers
• The eleven-something year old boy with a chocolate frappuccino, enthusiastically reading a car catalogue in the cafe.  You do you, kid.  You do you.
• That one Barnes ‘n’ Noble employee that insists you don’t bring any outside food or drink (whereas, every other employee literally does not care.  C’mon man, I just wanted to drink my soda in peace, I don’t have the weekly budget to buy your overpriced frappa-frickin’-chino, a.k.a. legalized addictives)
• The one couple with two laptops, an ice tea and a coffee, and five or six notebooks, quietly discussing something in serious tones (they’re either school teachers or assassins, there is no other option here)
• The one over-hassled Barnes ‘n’ Noble employee attempting to help the elderly couple who are taking off with all the coffee makers.
• The one creepy guy who’s always in the corner and felt the need to whistle loud enough for the whole store to hear when he went up to order a coffee. And yes, I can say with authority that he is "always" here, because I come to this store often enough to know :|

Who did you meet today?

Oktoberfest

Every year, our church has a big fundraiser in the form of an Oktoberfest.  Of course, it's not really an Oktoberfest, it's a bunch of Americans drinking beer and saying, 'See, we're German!' (they didn't even play Sweet Caroline :< )  We volunteered to help out; me at the face painting booth (with Mom as a manager), and Dad at the beer tent.  We had...an interesting night and met some definite characters:

• The previous shift of face painters, who seemed to think this job was the easiest thing in the world (the first shift is always really easy.  Then other kids start seeing the kids with their face painted and BAM)
• Literally dozens of parents forcing their unwilling three year old to sit down, hold still, the nice lady's going to paint a butterfly on your face so I can post a cute instagram, now SHUSH
• The black girl with a glitter skull tshirt that shyly asked me for Wonder Woman face paint.  She makes me feel happy inside :)
• When the kids don't know what they want, I usually try to speed up the process with some prompting of, "How about the butterfly?  It'd match your shirt, wouldn't it?"  One tiny little girl, after this prompting, fiercly declared, "NO.  I want SPIDERMAN."  She was the only girl that I gave super hero face paint (that was not Wonder Woman)
• The group -group?  Squad?  Gaggle? -of 9y.o.ish girls who decided it'd be a good idea to start complaining about how awful face painting was and how face painters were always so annoying while standing right next to me.  I thought this very brave of them, considering the face that I was going to be painting them next and we didn't have a mirror >:)  (no, I didn't paint anything bad on their face.  ....or did I ehehehe)
• The one mother who decided to smoke while standing in our tent
• The posh, professory-voiced man who walked past, explaining to his wife, "Now this is a religious festival, darling-"  I didn't catch the rest but it sounded like he was about to explain how we'd have a fascinating virgin sacrifice later to end off the celebration

I ended up having to go over-shift, since the next shift never showed up, and painted for three hours instead of my originally volunteered two. By the time it was over, I was sore and weak kneed, but a pretzel and a poorly cooked hot dog later, I was home, content and writing this blog post.

Who did you meet today?

P.S.

3 hours of face painting and this was the only personal paint I have to show for it:

Neighbors (New and Improved)

Summer is always a time of change.  More specifically, it's the time of moving trucks and new faces.  A lot of our neighborhood moved over the summer and now our new people are moving in.

We've got the people to the left of us, who have two identical minivans and two girls I will only describe as "the lemonade stand girls".  They also have a dog who is fond of taking himself for walks and a cat that I refer to as Watermelon, since that its approximent size and shape.

Catty corner to us, we have the pair of husbands with the cute white chairs on their front porch and the fluffy dog.  They are mysteriously never home.

Across, we've got the sporty, outdoorsy, adopt-everybody family, who are lovely and also never home. They've got the cute little three year old who wants nothing more to keep up with her big football playing brothers and the mom who, despite being perpetually tired out, mothers every kid in the neighborhood and throws the best block parties ever.

Opposite catty corner is a new family that are only just now moving in.  I'm calling them the Vampire Family.

And then next to us we have the other three year old (who's learning to ride her first big-kid bike right now), the day-working military mum, and the ten year old boy who plays saxaphone in the street in the evenings.

Neighbors are weird, man.

Who did you meet today?

P.S.
I had to look up, "Is it kitty corner or catty corner," because my mom thought it must be, 'kitty'.   Apparently, 'kitty', 'catty', and 'cater' corner are all acceptable, while 'caddy' is not.  #TheMoreYouKnow

Barnes 'n' Noble People: Pt 2

Click here for part one

• The guy with the haircut I would describe as a cross between “weed wacker” and “friendly hedgehog”, telling a long-winded stories about chicks (no, not the bird) to an semi-unwilling looking guy wearing an unfortunate shade of yellow
• A teenage girl with the poofiest dark hair, a coral business jacket and a beautiful floral skirt, and a cat headband who is now my fashion model for the next forever
• The poor, poor tutor that has to put up with a student who hasn’t just mastered the art of procrastinating, he’s destroyed it and become the next-gen procrastinator
• The barista’s face when he heard my mom ask for a pumpkin spice latte
• The guy whose hair was longer than mine and was at least twice my height (not literally; he’d have to be  really tall).  His arm was a sleeve of twisted tattoos; he was wearing a skull-emblazoned t-shirt, punk boots, and skinny jeans, and honestly looking so much more fabulous than me

Who did you meet today?

People You See at Barnes n Noble (An On-Going List)

Sometimes you don't see people who are that weird.  Other times...you see somebody you could only define as, "a character".  I see many of these, "characters," and decided to start writing them down, because... reasons.  Here's the ones I saw, just today:

• The balding man with reading glasses and sunglasses, a no-sleeve cameo shirt, running shorts, and crocs with mix-matched socks reading “The Art of War” (he also had a stack of other books, including history books on both World Wars)
• The equally balding man who sat behind me for 2+ hours reading the same copy of Top Gear, held within inches of his face
• The two black women who loudly marched in, yelled, “OH MY GAWD” when they realized Barnes and Noble was out of cookies (note: this was at 8:30 on a Friday night), complained for five minutes about the apparently lack of cookies and how, “I didn’t need a cookie but oh my gawd I wanted one so bad,” and then abruptly left
• The 20-something blonde who bought a grande coffee and then proceeded to march her stroller around the lobby/cafe space (in four inch heels!) in an attempt to make her crying child sleep (she then left with her presumed husband, chatting about how tired she was)
• Me, who, if you see me, is usually on my laptop, writing (a.k.a. looking frustrated, confused, or hitting my head against the table as I scroll through a document)

Who did you meet today?

Conversation is Sin

I was going through some old files and suddenly remembered a poem I wrote a looong time ago.  Some of it is kind of forced (because I struggle with ryhmning and fluid poetry)  but I think that the message is clear and I wanted to share it with you guys :)



Conversation is Sin

We live in a world where conversation is sin

Can’t speak outside the box that we choose to live in

If others are oppressing us then why don’t we attack

Because we know the demons inside

Would take us as their snack

If our eyesight fails

We blame it on the glasses

Our politicians are blind

Yet

They still lead the masses

Children are getting high

And teenagers are getting drunk

When a kid kills himself

It’s “just hormonal funk”

They say:  He had so much to live for

Something about God closing a door

And then they move on

AND THEN THEY MOVE ON

Like human life

Was made worthless by a knife

And don’t get me started

On the thousands, millions that starve

Can’t find food between the bombs

And the sound of rifle fire

News TV says words like ‘situation’ and ‘dire’

While people are killed

For the cross on their chest

For the people they love

No safe space, no true rest

We can’t talk

They’ve stuffed a gag down our throat

Labeled “everything’s fine”

They hope we don’t see the smoke

Somebody’s going to get offended

And we all shut up

A third world country gets upended

And nobody says a word

We all shake our heads

When we should scream in agony

For the loss of precious life

For the people we can’t see

“Like if you think-”

No shut up!  That’s enough!

You think likes are going to make this any less tough?

We’re not doing anything

Cuz we don’t know what to do

We were taught to ignore

The many and the few

Back to School

The children are wailing
There's fall leaves in the air
And the teachers are struggling
To pretend that they care

The summer has faded
And so has the fun
Now it's time
To get homework done

...My poetry skills need work.  But hey, back to school time!  This really isn't about anyone in particular, it's just a sad ballad for summer days now long lost.  Also, I wanted to showcase all my pretty school supplies because...yeah:

And it all matches!
The two notedbooks to the bottom left (the one with the dogs and the one with the manatee on it) are both completely recycled, which is why they're called, get this, Decomposition Notebooks

In case you were wondering, my reasoning was - English is a (Florida) swampland of complicated grammar and you always hear weird stories; the history one's kinda obvious, it has a very Greek mythological feel to it; and the dog one is because all dogs go to heaven, obviously.

So yeah, sorry for not many "Today I Met" updates lately, I've been....uh....busy.  Yeah, let's go with that (I've been drawing a lot okay).  Cya when I cya!

Antiques

There's this little town near where we live that I love.  It's small and artsy and has the sort of small town, artistic and beautiful vibe that I want to embody someday.  We went there recently, for the sole purpose of walking around.

We visited a tiny farmer's market that was filled with wooden sculptures, healthy foods (like eggplants.  Do people really eat eggplants?), and the creative craftiness that makes me want to PAINT ALL THE THINGS.  There was a stand that specifically sold jerky and long horn skulls; another that sold everything bee related (including wax chapstick); yet another that made bird houses out of dried out gourds.

As we walked along, we passed an old, falling-to-pieces shop that I've had the misfortune of seeing fall into ruin over time.  It's still the gem of the place:  pop art painted over white bricks, a garden scattered with rusty old chairs.  A picture of Madre Teresa so faded that she looks like a zombie.  It used to be a cafe or a boutique, I think, and people were always resting their feet in the garden.  Now it is abandoned.

Further on, we passed a tavern, which, despie being in the middle of the day, was already full of life.  A lady in a black crop top caught my eye, leaning against the wall.  She paused between texts to take a swig of her beer, then a cigarrette.  Wattresses brought laughing tables their food and the place smelled like BBQ and something else pleasent I couldn't quite place.

We stumbled upon an antique shop that I instantly fell in love with.  If I could, I'd take my laptop and just sit in that shop, writing the day away.  Maybe one day I will.

The halls were lined with boxes, and the ceiling was so high that a ladder was required to reach the top shelves.  The instant you walked in, you could smell the dust and the haunting familiarity; I couldn't shake the odd sort of feeling that everything there once belonged to a somebody, a somebody with a story and a life and a smile.

Boxes upon boxes of old nick knacks and gadgets.  Baskets of cookie cutters in odd shapes.  A yellowed wedding dress that I so wanted to buy, even though I may never marry.  A patterned jacket that I very nearly bought (and am now wishing I did) that probably walked straight out of the 80s.  Old candies with names I've never heard of before.  Paintings that should be in a museum, they're so beautiful.  A telephone with a curly black cord; a video camera that required you to turn a crank to work it; five working typewriters that made that soothing clicky-clack sound!

Gosh, I can't wait to go back to that shop, even if nothing has changed.  I just want to go back and see it all over again.

Where did you go today?

Listening to:  this soothing piano music

Evening Walk

Today my dog and I went for a walk, because it was nice out and why not?  While I didn't meet any one, per say, I did people watch along the way.  Here's some of the most noteable:

-one older lady who I can only describe as "the golf mom" with a visor, polo shirt, kakie shorts, a schnauzer, and a six year old

-Two mopy teenage girls pretending like they weren't swinging on the swings (because enjoying things that were fun as a child isn't cool)

-a man sitting on his front porch next to I kid you not the American flag made of Christmas lights, the size of a door turned sideways.  I can only imagine what his neighbors go through at night

-a teenager sitting in his drive way, back to the garage door, texting.  No clue why, you okay dude?

-an abundance of beautiful chalk art on many different sidewalks

-a group of friends playing volley ball - good for them!  They probably drink smoothies and go for early morning jogs together as well, and I applaud them for it

There weren't many people out, since I went out when it was starting too cool off and the sun was setting, but that just means the people who I did see stuck in my brain more.  Who did you see today?

Listening to:  s4 Sherlock's soundtrack

Things I Hear

I'm a bad listener (my parents and friends know this, as my chores always slip my mind and birthdays can never stick in my head).  But occasionally, I like to sit back and listen, just to see what I'm missing - and I don't mean listen to words, exactly.

When I listen, I hear the soothing way my hands fly across a keyboard.  The vent's slow, constant buzz of air.  My own heart beat, my own breath.

When I listen, I hear the way a person's voice rises and falls, like a never ending song.  I hear a child's soft stutter, the high pitch of one woman's voice and the boston accent of another.

When I listen, I hear thousands of stories, some going untold.  I can hear words missing from sentences, the dialogue of the world all around me.  The fabric of the universe; words.

When I listen, I hear the murmuring of my father when he crumples a paper, the soft creaking of a hammock, a child's shout outside.

I always try to end these posts profoundly, but it usually ends up cheesy and cringe-worthy.  So rather than try to be profound, I'll just leave you with these questions:  what did you hear today?  ...and what did you miss?

Barnes & Noble

My family go to Barnes & Noble a lot.  And by a lot, I mean enough that people have started to recognize us, and in return, we've started to regconize them.

I usually write these posts after-the-fact, looking back on my memories of an occasion.  But I didn't feel much like reading tonight, so when we made our weekly trip to the bookstore, I decided to bring my laptop and do a bit of 'live' posting.  Of course, I'm not really posting this live; you're reading this through the magic of the internet and writing.  Cool, isn't it?  So let's harness that magic a bit:

I'm sitting in the back corner of the cafe, and from here, I have a lovely view of the sleepy people that trail in on a Tuesday evening.  To the right of me is my father, back against the wall as he types wildly (looks like he's writing an imporant email, judging by the way he keeps sighing and rubbing his forehead).  There's a pretty girl a couple tables down with her headphones in and a highlighted book in front of her; she looks like she's been here a while.  A water bottle, mug, and laptop are strewn across the table in front of her.  Her bangs keep falling in her eyes as she reviews the pages.

To my right is a guy with a coffee and a stack of books that he's not reading.  He's scruffy, a bit of beard sprinkling his chin as he focuses on his phone.  I'm not one to judge; I'm surrounded by thousands of books and I'm writing, not reading

There's a busty woman with hair like a volcano made of fluff walking off, a lanyard in hand, and another man ordering at the cafe (hopefully he's not trying to use a starbucks giftcard.  PSA:  B&N doesn't accept starbucks giftcards.  Save the card, save a barista's life)

A man with silver hair, librarian glasses, and shorts that are just a bit to short just lumbered down the side aisle.  He looks friendly, like he just came from the beach (his flip flops attest to that.  Life that party life, man).   He crossed paths with a woman with a ponytale and gum I can hear her chewing from twenty feet away.

The only other occupied table is claimed by a tutor with the patience of a rock and a student whose study habits are so bad they simultaneously horrify and impress me.  They've been here multiple times, and as far as I know, no studying has occured yet, though they seem to be getting along well, dicussing politics and facts.  Still, the tutor remains patient, calm.  It's honestly impressive.  If I were a little bald guy with bifocals and a student like that, I'd have strangled them long before today.  The student and I have chatted a few times, just the normal 'hey how's it going, have a nice day now'.

Those are the only people in the cafe, but more people are filtering in as the evening picks up speed; there's a few more hours of business time, after all.  This is my world, right now - and you saw it all, through magic.

Who did you meet today?

Church People

Every Sunday I attend a local church with my family, and every Sunday I see new people.  Since we sat in the back on this particular morning, I had a lovely view of all the various people that I hadn't noticed before, including (though definitely not limited to):

-a girl no younger than five in a fancy dress, with a purse and her hair done up nicely,....barefoot
-a boy walking down the aisle with a pencil in his ear (pointy side in!)
-a woman in a full-blown veil (it was a very pretty veil)
-a baby who I swear was cosplaying as a strawberry
-a family of all guys who came in twenty minutes late in sports jerseys
-at least fifty people who left before Mass was over (and not even subtly)
-and finally, a guy who slept through the entire Mass, and as far as I know, never woke up*

*I wrote this as I was watching people file out, since we had to stay late.  The man eventually did wake up, and we realized that he was most likely homeless (judging by his attire and the fact that he was carrying a shopping back filled with miscellanious items).  He's in my prayers, and I'm glad he feels safe enough at our church to sleep.  God bless!

Who did you meet today?

Tennis Ball

Today I noticed that there's a tennis ball in our gutter.  It's only visable from my parent's bedroom, where the blinds are usually closed, but today they were open and there it was: an old, filthy tennis ball.  So filthy, in fact, that I couldn't tell what the colour of it was - black?  I've never seen a black tennis ball, so maybe it was just really that dirty, having sat in the gutter like a sad, forgotten relic of whoever lived here before us.  I wonder who was the unfortunate kid who lost it - were they playing with a dog?  Eachother?  Just tossed it up there by lucky throw?

So many questions, and all inspired by an old dirty tennis ball.  What did you notice today?

Adventures with Kids (Episode 4)

Girl #1:  Do you have a boyfriend?
Me:  No.  Remember, you were very shocked about that?
#1:  Oh yeah.  When are you getting one?
Me:  *glare*
#2:  Yeah, when are you?
Me:  Next time I go to the store, I'll be sure to buy one
#1:  oh okay

* a little while later *

#1:  What are you going to name him?
Me:  Chris Evans

Adventures with Kids (Episode 3)

(Completely out of the blue, with no warning or pretense) Girl #2: Do you have a boyfriend?
Me:  No
#2:  Why not?
Me: *no answer*
#1: Aren't you an old person?
Me:  I'm 15
#1:  Yeah, an old person.  So why don't you have a boyfriend?
Me:  haven't met the right guy yet
#3:  What if we found you the right guy?
Me:  um
#3:  Here, take this pen.  This is your boyfriend.
#1:  His name is Tim
#3:  Now kiss him
Me:  ...let's get back to the lesson

Adventures with Kids (Episode 2)

I always art tutor on request - they request something, and I teach them how to draw it, repeat, for an hour a week.  They get entertainment and babysitting, I get paid...it's a pretty sweet gig.  The only sad part is the questions I have to put up with.

On this particular occassion, Girl #1 had reqested...a pug.  We finished up and she looked at her drawing and just let out this awful squealling noise before hugging her notebook.

Me: ???
Girl #2:  She does that
Girl #3:  She gets pug happy
#1: I T S JUST SO C U T E!!!!!
Me:  ...okay then
#2:  I'm that way about- about, um, about-
#3:  I like seals
#2:  puppies.  No, not really puppies, just kittens, munchkin kittens-
#3:  Or dolphins
#2:  yeah, just munchkin kittens, dogs, and chickens
#3:  What do you get happy about
Me: ...
Me: I get bucky barnes happy
#1:  what's bucky barnes?
#2:  what do you do when you see one?
Me: ...
Me: ...
Me: mostly cry

Adventures with Kids

There's these little girls that I give art lessons...they say some strange, strange things, and I decided it was time to write down the funniest.  (Girl #1 and 2 are both eight and #3 is six, in case you were wondering)

Girl #1:  Do you have a phone?
Me:  No
Girl #2:  Why not?  I have a phone
Girl #3:  Yeah same
Girl #1:  Do you parents not want you to have a phone?  Is that why?
Me:  Actually, they'd let me get a phone...if I wanted one
#2:  Why don't you want a phone?
Me:  I don't find them useful
#1:  But-
Me:  Everything a phone does, my computer can do
#3:  Wh-wh-wh-what about calling people?  A computer can't do that?
Me:  We have a home phone
#3:  Oh
#1:  But what if your home phone is stolen
Me:  There's six of them, it's highly unlikely
#2:  But what if they're ALL stolen
Me:  Then I can use my mom's cell phone

*there is silence for a while*

#2:  what about when you get married and you need to make a call?
Me: ...
Me: ...I think I'll have a phone by the time I get married

Neighbors

I was lucky enough to get a near-da-corner home when I moved into our new home.  Our neighbors are friendly, there's always cars passing, and it's just a generally cute little area.  I hope it remains that way for all eternity.

However, sometimes, leaving the house makes me feel like Belle in Beauty and the Beast, like 'BONJOUR, GOOD DAY, BE OUR GUEST BE OUR GUEST' and I just stand there like 'I just want to check my mail let me be free'.  I mentioned this to the next door neighbor and he said that he was just as a-social as me.  Good to know that there's some one out there that's just as confused by the musical-type friendlness that is our neighborhood.

Side note:  I really do like my neighbors.  They're just...outdoorsy, energetic, friendly, and all that nonsense.

Woman in a Yellow Skirt

I went to a wedding in the past few weeks and had a chance before hand to just sit and look around.  Most of them were generally familiar faces of distant family members (oooooh you've gotten so tall!  How's school, dear, what do you want to be when you get older?) but since it was a wedding, there was a whole host of people I had never seen before, including this woman.

She was pretty, in an worn-out sort of way.  Her hair was tossed strawberry blonde and she wore the wrinkles on her face like a war paint.  It did not matter that her clothes (a hot pink + sunshine yellow skirt and blazer combo) were the boldest colors alive; she was bold, with pink lipstick painted on emotionless lips.

I don't know if I described her like I should, because I never spoke a word to this woman.  But she sat directly across from my family, and she never once looked over at me.  Her lips remained pinched the whole time, and she sat alone.  Not even during the wedding did she whisper how pretty the bride was to her equally bold partner, for none showed up.

After the wedding, she vanished, slipping by while I was held back for pictures.  But I hope she's out there, with loved ones, happy, because she seemed so bold and lonely and prim at the wedding.  Nobody should be alone at a wedding, nobody.

Who did you meet today?

The People Who Never Look Up

I went on a trip recently, which was the reason there was no posts, sorry about that.  The funny thing is, my family and I drove our RV on our vacation, using it both as our main source of transportation and as our home for the two (separate) weeks we were gone.

This isn't so much a post about this one person I met, but rather a hoard of people I saw, just driving by.  You see, when you have a good 50+ hours to kill with no internet connection, you've got four options:

1. Sleep (I did lots of that)
2. Try to entertain yourself via drawing, writing, or singing along to the radio (mostly made me carsick, but I still did some of that!)
3. Try to accomplish schoolwork (Lord forbid, be responsible?!)
4. People watch

And me being an a-social blogger who draws people she sees and doesn't talk at parties, you can guess what I did in my many hours of spare time.  That's right, watch the people in the cars as they drove by our giganto RV.

I saw old women who probably had guns in their glove boxes, buff eighteen wheeler drivers eating Subway sandwiches, Indian women talking and/or yelling at each other in rapid-fire speech while some poor mustached man sat there trying to make it through traffic, a scary-looking bald guy with a chihuahua in his lap, a corgi in the passenger seat, and what looked like a German shepherd in the back, and dozens of children (both in the back seat AND in the front seat -_- ), most of them playing on their phones.

And none of them look up.

None of them even look out the window.

None of them are taking in the world around them.  In fact, a lot of them were quiet literally asleep.  And don't get me wrong, I slept for probably a good 50-65% of the trip, but I mean...not even a, "Oh hey, look, there's a giant RV trundling past."

Not that I want to be stared at, but it's an odd sort of thing - we live in a world so jam-packed with THINGS and STUFF.  There is so much to see and learn and hear and you'll never see any of it if you spend a car trip playing the newest addicting game on your iPhone 8.72S (whatever the heck is the new one right now).

So next time you're a passenger in a car, or you're stuck in a traffic jam, or hey, maybe passing an RV, look up.  Smile at some one passing by.  You don't know what you'll see, and maybe it'll be boring, but maybe you'll see something that'll stick with you your whole life.

Just don't be one of the People Who Never Look Up.

And on that dramatic note:  who did you meet today?

An Artsy Extrovert

So I took a quiz recently and discovered that I'm...not extroverted, like I thought for years.  As of right now, I'm a bit more ambiverted, which means I'm right down the middle, torn between people and alone time.  From what I can tell, most people are extroverts, but tend to be somewhat reserved.  A seven on a scale of one to ten.

But every so often, you meet somebody that's really, truly, and completely extroverted.  And that was this girl that I met in art class.

Brief context description time!  *transition music*  In my art class, we set up our own easels, which means we pick our location in the class room.  Since I'm usually there early, I don't get a chance to chose who ends up next to me, which is actually pretty cool in my opinion.  It gives me an opportunity to meet people I wouldn't normally talk to, which brings me back to the subject today (only took me three paragraphs to actually get to it :P )

With a leather vest and Pokemon patterned hat, this girl walked in like she owned the place.  I don't know why, but I was avoiding her loud voice for the past few weeks of classes, but when she ended up next to me, I realized there was no pride or aggression on her lips, only friendliness, Hamilton quotes, and questions for the art instructor.  She was a really good artist too, with a style completely different from mine.  I didn't catch her name, but she didn't need one - she was a force unto herself.  I won't be mistaking her for anybody else, name or not.

Who did you meet today?

Some New-Old Friends

It's odd, how you can see some one and speak with them on a weekly basis, and yet still not know anything about them.

I go to an online academy, so often times you end up chatting with people that you'd never become friends with, never even consider talking to in real life.  It's an amazing world out there, filled with potential, and if you give people time, you'll rarely be disappointed.  And even if you are...what's so bad about that?  Not everybody is friend material, and that's alright.

Today I opened up to some girls in my class, via email.  I told them my hobbies and age, and suddenly, they came alive.  Girls who I have no hope of meeting irl, whose faces are smudges of paint unused and barely remembered in my mind, suddenly comfortable around each other.

One loves crocodiles, another is an avid Sherlock fan.  One knows four languages.  One has a father in the military (that's me, actually)

Who did you meet today?

Me

(My attempt at an intro)

It’s difficult to be honest when writing about myself, but I’ll do my best.  I am a writer and a blogger, obviously.  I’ve been at it for years; my blogging career has seen me grow from a tiny eleven year old to the girl I am now.  Hair like carmel, flopped to one side, small hands with half-chipped nail polish and acrylic paint in the creases, eyes that only look pretty with the best of lighting.  Still, I think that in my own, unique way, I am beautiful, despite my lack of perfect cheek bones and my many faults.

I love meeting new people, but struggle with the ‘meeting’ bit, because it requires I leave the house and actually attend potentially embarrassing social events.  My art is my passion, but I have a tendency to toss aside all responsibilities to follow that passion.  I get emotional easily.  I struggle with my self-worth.  I stutter when I speak.

However, I am not Mexican and my stutter is not Trump’s wall.  That’s who I feel about most of my vices, really.  I have too much to say to allow a little bit of tripping over my own words to stop me anyway.

And I better cut this off before I really do speak too much.  Who did you meet today?

The Purpose of this Blog

To be honest.

Not scathing.  Not rude.  Just...honest.

Honest with myself, mostly, over who I really am, and who I talk to everyday and interact with without even thinking about it, but also honest with others, of how I'd describe them if I wanted to.

I'm still figuring it out, so if you come back to this post with confusion and the words, "That's not what it's like now!" on your electronic lips, I'm not surprised.  It's a bit like a travel blog, I suppose, but without the real traveling.  A life style blog?  No, not really...I'm going to try to avoid talking about myself and my actual life.  Maybe there isn't anything like this blog, and that's why I can't seem to find the right words to describe it.

At any rate, I hope you enjoy my writing.  I'll post something real soon, and I hope you have a wonderful day!

Note:  yes, this blog was built on top of one of my older blogs, because I didn't want to delete it but I also didn't want it just hanging around and doing nothing of interest.  Feel free to read all of my old dorkiness :)

Hi Guys! (Important News)

Ok so
I've decided to rework this blog into something totally different!  I originally really liked the idea of Two Cats Too Many, but I just....ran out of ideas.  It's not really my thing, and it doesn't match up with my blogging style anymore.  So I'm going to try something new!

That's the nice thing about having a blog like this, one that the grand majority of my normal readers don't know about...I can actually experiment and try new things and that sort of stuff.  So...yeah.  Expect some major changes, and some of my old posts might disappear (I will most likely try and keep most of them though, if only to please my mother, who insists that they are good and must stay.  See, I do love you, mother :D )

Bye, and I hope you like the updated version!

Advice for Happy Blogging

(Note: I am not trying to sound famous or fabulous or anything in this post.  I just have experience with blogging and want to put it to use)

I have a lot of friends with blogs and sometimes they come to me for advice, or just tech issues in general.  Here is my list of advice you'll need to be a happy blogger. :D

- Remember, you don't have to post every week.  I wouldn't say you shouldn't, but if you don't post regularly at first but have quality content in your blog, people will look forward to your every word, no matter how delayed.

- Flip side: don't forget that your blog does exist.  A blog only works if you keep up with it.

- Repeat after me: don't look at the stats.  Don't look at the stats.  DON'T LOOK AT THE STATS.  Instead, devoutly ignore them for a minimum of three months, although you'll be better off only checking them every six months.  You'll end up obsessing over useless numbers.  Only over time can you get real statistics and figure out what people like.  Continuing on that...

- Never, ever, ever, EVER write about stuff just for the view count.  IT WILL SHOW.  Write about stuff that matters to you, no matter what that might be.

- Show your inner dork.  People like dorks.  I like dorks.  Your inner dork likes it when you show your inner dork.

- Tell stories about your life.  It doesn't have to be huge or dramatic, but write about the things that stand out.  The funny occurrence at school.  The way the rain splattered against the window.  A small nod to your friend who you love and support, and who does the same to you.

As I say to my friends: follow this advice and you'll be one happy blogger.